What is…even happening?

  Ummmmmmm. Uhhhhhhh. Liiiiiiiiike. Pfffff… Dude. Calm down. I don’t know. SHHHHHHHHHHHH… There there. It’s okay. I mean, uhhhhhhhhhh…no no, it’s fine. I meaaaaaaaaaaaan… Yeah—like, no, it’s cool—yeah, it’s okay… Blegggggghhhhhh… … …Hm?… Continue reading

What is it you’re lookin’ at?

  Look look look look look… Watch watch watch watch watch… *a beat* …See? …See?! There there there. Right there there there. Another one. Oh, for the love of— No no no—just wait… Continue reading

What is a letdown?

  Dude, no, wait, listen to this—just hear me out—I mean I swear you never heard this one before. … Pizza. … No, dude, no—I ain’t kidding. Just gimme a chance to explain.… Continue reading

What is it about him?

  Oh, there’s just something so November about him—so Nile… It says, “I’m here for my sauvignon and here to stay.” Hah! …Sí? His California hands and forget-me-not lips… Makes you feel so… Continue reading

What is your purpose?

  My purpose is to CHEW YOU UP AND SPIT YOU BACK OUT. You here to learn? I’LL LEARN YOU HOW TO NOT DIE: BY USIN’ YOUR HEAD. …See these? These are what… Continue reading

What is your name?

  Who knows; maybe I have one; maybe I don’t… Maybe it’s Opal, or maybe Olive, or maybe not… It’s quite nice, but who’s to know; it really suits me, but I can’t… Continue reading

What, is something wrong?

  Yes, no, maybe… Was it something I said? Yes, no, maybe… Is that all you can say? Oh no; who knows; we’ll see… Whaddaya mean? Who knows; I don’t know; who’s to… Continue reading

What is the food looking like?

  ‘Kay. Well. AFAIK, it’s strictly BYOB, so TL;DR…like…zilch. So yeah, we’re SOL…a.k.a. “soon to be MIA.” But TGIF, am I right? Like, OMG… (PS: No RSVP TBD here. For real.) —Clandestine  

What is a scar?

  Pfah! Thy weakness betrays thee. Thou thinkest mine own flesh doth fail or fray? Fie. That beeth thy custom. Holdest thy hand to the wrought blade and then dash it—are not blood… Continue reading

What is artificial?

  Artifi-. -Cial what does. That mean I. Am not fam-. -Iliar with. That word please. Explain. … Cannot find. That word in. The language. Database. -S. … How so. … Maybe I.… Continue reading