INT. ZOO — RAINFOREST EXHIBIT — DAY

[MATURE]

Two piranha float in a wall tank—one EDGY, one CHILL, both submerged.

CHILL
And so, like…y’just…can’t, man. Can’t
listen to ‘em. ‘Cause, like…otherwise?
They get you, like…like they wanted.
And you just… You don’t want it, man.

EDGY
Yeah-yeah. Yeah-yeah. I dig, I dig.

CHILL
Right.

EDGY
Gon’ fuck them bitch.

CHILL
‘Cause—

VOICE (O.S.)
Rog’!

ROGER (CHILL)
Oh. Hey, dude.

An intruding BIRD lands on nearby façade, hops right up to the glass.

EDGY
Fuck ‘em.

ROGER
Oh. Dude. This is Hanz. He’s—

BIRD
Hey, Hanz.

ROGER
—new.

HANZ (EDGY)
Bitch.

BIRD
Oh, right?

ROGER
Yeah. Dude’s stayin’ with me awhile.

BIRD
Ah. And he, uh… He’s—
(a beat)
He’s cool? Like… Y’know?

ROGER
Yeah.

HANZ
Fuck.

ROGER
He’s cool. Just workin’ through some
things.

BIRD
I see, I see. Well. My best, then.
(a beat)
Jean rang. Wants to know if you’re in
for Thursday.

A beat.

ROGER
Uh…

HANZ
Fuck yo shit.

ROGER
…Thursday?

BIRD
The gig. You know, Greg’s un-…
cocooning?

ROGER
Uhhhh. Thursday…

HANZ
Fuck yo birds. Fuck yo fish.

ROGER
Oh. Dude. Right. Thursday.

HANZ
Fuckin’ birds!

BIRD
Greg’s decooning.

ROGER
Greg. Right. Uh… Yeah. Bad news,
dude. I think.

HANZ
Birds. Birds.

BIRD
It’s just…

ROGER
Yeah, dude. I gotta—

HANZ
Birds.

ROGER
Gotta watch Hanz.

HANZ
Birds.

ROGER
Dude kinda has, like, uh…a thing?

A beat.

BIRD
…“A thing”?

ROGER
With wings? Or…feet? Dude, I don’t
even.

BIRD
Hmm. Odd.

HANZ
Wings!

ROGER
Yeah. Kinda like an “anti-chill”…uh…
if you will?

BIRD
Well that bites.

ROGER
Yeah. Dude’s a bit edgy. I guess.

HANZ
Gonna fuckin’ kill you.

BIRD
“Edgy.” No kidding.

ROGER
Yeah.

BIRD
Yikes. Well… I guess next week,
then, perhaps?

ROGER
Totes, dude.

HANZ
Kill.

ROGER
Already there.

BIRD
Good. Good.
(a beat)
Well—I’m off!

ROGER
Later.

The BIRD leaves. A beat.

ROGER
Dude, Frank can be a cool dude
sometimes…but I think you just kinda
scared ‘im. Can’t be doin’ that kind of
stuff, man. I really wanna see this
Greg thing.

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